Evil Dead 2

Ash sits down and breaks the old wooden chair. Deer head turns, looks, and starts laughing at Ash. Lamp begins to laugh at him as well. The books on the shelf start to snicker. The larger lamp starts laughing too. Ash joins the laughter. Ash continues to laugh insanely. The room begins to spin around him. The room is old and everything is dusty. Mostly dark in the room. Ash's face is soiled with dirt and blood. The camera angle needs to spin around him as the laughter occurs. Camera zooms in and out on the different elements in the room as they begin to laugh. Ash opens mouth extremely wide to emphasize how crazed he is. The gun must stay in Ash's hand as he flails about. The lamp must be shaking as it laughs. Books need to flutter. The lamp bends in unison with Ash.

THE PUBLIC RESTROOM

The shit house poet
here I sit brokenhearted
couldn't drop a deuce

People paint the stalls
To stop my sharpie, screw'em
Excrete on the walls

Roaches on the walls
Yellow on the white tile floor
Feet now stuck for sure

It's the law, bitch!

If I could pass any law I wanted, I would have to say that I would pass a law to make dodge ball a permanent part of Physical Education in the United States. Everyone knows dodge ball is one of, if not the most beloved gym game of all time. I feel that it is ridiculous that the school system (particularly ours) has banned it. I don't even understand any reasons why this has happened. We play with Nerf balls for god's sake! They don't even hurt when you get hit! How is such a fun and light-hearted game so evil? The most fun I have ever had in gym class was while playing a game of dodge ball. I wouldn't want future generations to be deprived of the fun that I was able to have. The school system has become so pussed out. Will they take away the fact that someone can be deemed a winner because it would make the loser feel too bad? What have we come to here!? It is a great game that works on speed, agility, hand-eye quardination, strenght, teamwork, and social skills. This game gives real insight to the real world. Be weak and stupid and get run over, or be smart and know how to capitalize on your strenghts and become successful.

My creature is called the blob. The blob is a very interesting creature. It comes in many different colors. It comes in blue, green, orange, black, red, purple, yellow, clear, and white. The blob does not take dumps, or piss. It does not need any food or need to be fed by the care giver. The creature survives on the environment around it. It thrives on sunlight and the geothermal energy from the earth. The blob's name is what it is. It is essentially a blob. The thing chills and moves around wherever it pleases. It can't hate you or judge you like a real person will sometimes do. It has no natural habitat because it was genetically engineered.

This product here is the Plasma Rifle! The Plasma Rifle is a type of raygun that uses a small nuclear reactor or fuel cell or any other type of advanced energy storage device. The power cell powers an electromagnetic accelerator that shots a pulse or stream of plasma. Plasma is just very hot, exited matter which means the particles are moving around extremely fast. The primary function of the weapon which dishes out damage is the thermal exchange which causes serious burns and often times immediate death. The plasma can also melt and vaporize certain inorganic materials. An example of these materials is almost any kind of metal or solid armor. This makes it far more useful than a regular gun when it comes to shooting at armored vehicals of any kind. The Plasma Rifle can range from a pistol size to a cannon size depending on the use. If you're looking to lay seige to a large area range, the larger size is the best option. For arming a foot solidier, you would want a more moble divice like the pistol or rifle sized version. This is the future! This will revolutionize the way us and our military look at weapons! The current price is about $11,999.

Quinton Rampage Jackson gets caught in a triangle choke from hell. The sweat drips off his eyebrow onto the crude canvas and his opponent's face. He summons strength only achievable through years and years of training to thrust his opponent into the air. Rampage's back ripples as it thrusts a man his same weight up over his head. The opponent is helpless; no control over his body and no means to protect it. Rampage tightens his muscles and begins to swing the 205 pounds back to earth. As Rampage's feet leave the ground, the combined weight of 410 pounds careens down to the canvas while the lights of news cameras flash. The opponent's face is struck with fear as his certain doom finally becomes a reality. The opponent's body tightens to try to brace itself from the neck-breaking slam. His feet are still locked around Rampage's torso. There is no time to release them due to Rampage's quickness. With every muscle in Jackson's body thrusting the weight back to earth, the opponent meets the canvas. A shock wave is let loose immediately upon impact. Gasps of horror erupt over the entire audience. The man is knocked completely unconscious unsurprisingly. Rampage immediately begins raining down blows onto the opponent's face without remorse!

"The Natural"

Wow, the web designer did a wonderful job on the sight. The side pop-out tool bar and navigation really make it slick. I do enjoy looking over all of the pictures. It even has the picture of Tim Sylvia and I when we went turkey hunting, and man was that a big one I snagged! That was a thirty yard shot in some thick brush! I also like how they included my bio so that people could understand how I had to climb the latter to get where I am now in the UFC. This sight also advertises my most recent fight that's coming up versus Brock Lesnar. I think it's going to be a great fight and I'm looking forward to testing myself and to find out if I've still got it. This fight will decide for me if I still belong in the UFC. The picture featuring my UFC edition Hummer isn't really nessisary in my eyes. After all, that's not what I'm all about. But if fans are interested in my personal life then I would be glad to display that information. Thanks to my fans this sight is possible, so any way I can give back to them is something I'm willing to do. My bio is also very well done. The only thing I can think of as a critique is to include some of my younger years and the things I was doing as a kid. The way a person grows up and the way they are raised has alot to do with who they become and I think that would be a valuable bit of info to include. You can view the sight here.

#1 Its the RHCP

MUSICIAN

This here is a picture featuring the Red Hot Chili Peppers. You could call them a funk/rock/punk/alternative band. They were one of the first bands to start combining these completely different music styles, Punk and Funk for instance. Flea, the bass player (second from the right), was associated with multiple bands when RHCP had got its start including Fear, which was a very heavy punk band that was popular in the LA music scene. Yet he and others from the band were also heavily influenced by Funk and soul bands such as Sly on The Family Stone. The sound mixture and style really got the attention of the public and was what really got them noticed in the music world. In my opinion if you introduce something that sounds new and revolutionary, it will receive attention and in this case that was true. Now the Chili Peppers play huge shows around the world and have many loyal fans, but were this sound mixture is most prevalent is in their earlier years and albums. From the right: John Frusciante, Flea, Anthony Kiedis, and Chad Smith.

PEER

These dudes up here are the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Their funky-ass starburst energy and music blows my ear hole! You probably wonder why they are naked and what I say to that is, WHY NOT?! These guys used to perform their music on stage with a tube socks covering their nuts and shlongs! No joke man, its for real and its bomb! Although to my slight disappointment they don't really do a bunch of crazy shit anymore but the music is still amazing. A lot of my favorite tunes lie in the older eras of the Chili Peppers, but I must throw out there that Kiedis (guy 3rd from the right) really improved his actual singing voice over time. Back then he kind of did raps in a way as well as some scatting along with some awesome voice variation. It screamed style man, screamed it. O and the bass lines that Flea (who's the guy second from the right) busts out freakin rule. The slapping and popping is funky as hell and the band would not be near the same without it!